Stop Taking Advantage Of Me!

I’m pretty tech savvy, I must admit.  I am self-taught in just about everything I do from running my own business to blogging.  I have learned it and applied it to everyday practices however I have one problem and it’s a doozy of a problem.  I’m too nice.  I am not a complete push over but for some reason so many people think it’s ok to walk all over me and my time.  I’m the first person that people will come to with a business question or when they need something fixed.  Most of the time I will help out because that’s what I do, I help.  However it’s getting to the point where that once loved four letter word is starting to get to me; help.

Helping is supposed to feel rewarding.  It’s supposed to throw a touch of love and positivity into the universe.  Don’t lie.  You love it when people help you.  You love it when people help you bring in the groceries.  You love it when people help fold towels so you don’t have to do them all.  You love it when someone offers to help you out whether it be at home or at work.  People LOVE helping others and being helped.  I have to believe that.  But what happens when the one who is always offering help never gets anything in return?  It gets exhausting and very lonely.  I sit here and will jump at the chance to help someone because it means they need me.  Who doesn’t like to feel needed?

So when you are tired of being the one who always helps out where needed and you suddenly stop helping or you decide you want to start charging for the shit you do, then all of a sudden you aren’t needed anymore.  For example, today at work this woman {we will call her Sarah}, asked me to help out with a table of kids.  Because I am the go-to person, I’m asked first and when I reply “Sure”, I don’t even get a thank you…or a smile of acknowledgement!  Will it kill you to say thank you?  When I reply with sponsorship rates to emails I get from agents or PR reps after they’ve requested that I “share this article” with my readers. I hear crickets.  No, I will not work for free.  Do you work for free?  Even with my own kids…they will ask for help and I’ll be right there helping, but the moment I ask for help, suddenly everyone is busy.

When I worked in a busy medical office, I used to say with a laugh “Do I have a flashing sign on my forehead that says INFORMATION”?  I said that because people would walk in the office and being a receptionist, I was the first person they would see so why not ask me a question that I was forced to come up with an answer to.  I would get the most bizarre questions asked that would make your head spin, but I answered them with a smile because that was my job.

My job at this moment isn’t to further your career as a result from my knowledge if you aren’t paying me.  Don’t forget, I’ve had a husband who has been laid off for months on end due to the nature of his occupation.  I am just as strapped for cash as you….if not more…you don’t know.  My time is valuable so if you aren’t willing to compensate me for my time, good-bye to you.  I work hard each and every day to learn new tips and techniques and I will charge appropriately for that knowledge.  I am very skilled in marketing and PR and I will use it to my own advantage, not yours.  Unless of course, you’re paying me to do so that is.  I started a new business to directly help my family, not yours.   Sounds harsh, but it’s the truth and I think you know it.  I will share every ounce of what I now with my paying clients.  As for those asking for advice, it’s no longer free.  For those of you asking me to help you get your products to magazines, tv shows or celebrities, not until you pay first.  And to those asking for help with their blog or any other areas of virtual assistance, I’ll require you to pay first.

I am done offering free help – I’m tired of being taken advantage of.

How about you?  Are you a helper or have you been the one always asking for help?  If you’ve started to put your foot down and demanded that you stop being taken advantage of, how has your experience changed your life?  Are you happier as a result?